Today I called my dad to tell him I wasn’t going to his wedding. It wasn’t the easiest thing I’ve ever done, but it feels like an incredible weight off of my shoulders–I’ve been dreading this day for years. I know he wasn’t happy–he didn’t say “I love you” when he got off the phone. I didn’t really expect him to.

I gave him the short version of why I wasn’t attending. He spent 20 years telling me how important marriage is, how him and mom were bucking the trend, so on and so forth. I feel that way about my marriage. You could destroy everything I own and as long as I still had Al, I could get through it. I would marry him again and again and again and I thank God that I stumbled onto such a wonderful, supportive MAN. For that reason (among many others that probably only Al knows), I just can’t attend. I can’t fix the world’s problems, but I can take a stand for family and what’s right and good in my own life.

I sort of feel bad because I’m sure he’s hurt by it, but I just think about notes my dad had sent to me when I was doing things wrong (not helping mom, picking on my brother, etc.) and they didn’t make me feel good, but they needed to be said. I feel that it’s the same type of thing. Hopefully, he will respect my decsion as an adult and will accept it as I have done with his decision to divorce my mother. Only time will tell how this all pans out, I guess.

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